Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Brand New Day

It may be worth noting that it has been nearly a year since my last post.

God is an amazing God.  He will follow us wherever we meander along our walk with Him.

Expressing my faith - no, expressing what I know and have seen of God's truths - through artistic means, is air to me.  I forget from time to time how vital that expression is for my feeling of fulfillment in life, but when I remember, the realization is sharp.  Someday I may not have the ability to sing.  Voices grow weaker and shakier with age, and singing God's message through Christina Aguilara, Pink, Alanis ... that's my air.  I am already partially deaf in one ear; some day I may not be able to hear new passionate pop artists on the radio speaking God's words into my heart.  And for almost an entire year I have not breathed modern music air from my radio.

Well it's a brand new day.

A couple weeks ago, one of my favorite people to hear speak reminded me that God sees me.  Not just when I come to Him, rushing to Him with my ideas and plans, but just as much when I am wandering away, or timidly keeping my distance.  He is there, loving me, knowing me, waiting for me as a father waits for his child.  Even when I am struggling, in the depths of my own versions of hell, He is there beside me and within me, ready to start fresh, asking to be my everything.  There is nowhere too far for Him.

My return to this blog may not seem quite so melodramatic as the above paragraph describes.  Yet the truth that God has seen me, fighting for sleep with two young kids, stepping over clutter, balancing too many plates on too tiny of sticks, losing my keys, my wallet, my wedding rings, my mind ... there is something freeing in knowing that He has seen all of that and has been there the whole time.  He has seen me forgetting to breathe my air and He stands here offering it to me still.

Coming back to this blog is like Sting's lyrics - finding an old photo of someone I love, recognizing that old smile I've been thinking of, and turning the clock right back to zero.  It's not the blog which I love.  I'm a horrible blogger.  It's what I find when I hear God's message in an unexpected place, and the compulsion I have to share what I hear with other people.  Once upon a time I had other venues for that impulse - singing, performing, and speaking to congregations about the connection between God's word and the art around us every day.  But for everything there is a season, and those opportunities happen to be out of season right now.  This little blog project was designed to fill that space, and today it feels like a breath of fresh air.

Sting isn't the easiest to understand; you can read the lyrics here.

This song says a dozen other things to me as well.  I hope you find an insight of your own in it!